Growing Up Feels Like A Party—Until It Doesn’t

Have you ever woken up after a party and felt nothing but regret? Maybe you drank too much, kissed someone you wish you hadn’t or went out even though you didn’t want to. 

I’ve been there. I was 15 when I attended my first party in Cuba. What started as movie nights with friends soon turned into evenings with music and alcoholic drinks.

After I turned 18, I moved to Spain and began using parties to escape and forget my personal problems.

That pressure to escape is real. I had family problems and worked 12-hour shifts. Going out was my time to forget my responsibilities, expectations and worries. 

What I failed to understand is that I was trapped in a vicious cycle: I knew it was wrong, but it helped me forget.

I was also surrounded by others doing the same thing and I didn’t know the impact of indulging in such an unhealthy coping mechanism.

It’s easy to say that my struggles drove me to party, but in reality, it had more to do with the responsibilities and freedom that comes with growing up.

Even if we deny it, the “friends” we surround ourselves with have an enormous influence. 

They may not stay in our lives for long, but when they do, we go to parties we don’t want to be at.

That new sense of freedom can also influence us. When I went out, I felt like an adult, like a character from a movie or TV series. Going out to parties was an excuse to feel more grown up.

But now, as I step deeper into adulthood, I have no idea what being an adult means.

Looking back, I wonder: Did I go out because I liked it? Was I using it as an escape? Is partying the problem or is the problem how we party?

Think about it: at 18, a door opens to risky decisions and situations we may not be prepared for. 

Before seeking independence and maturity through parties, you need to consider and understand the dangers: spiked drinks, getting lost or ending up in serious situations—even extreme cases like human trafficking. 

And remember: true friends don’t care if you skip a party or choose not to drink—they’ll stay with you no matter what.

As someone who spent years caught in this cycle and now carries a lot of remorse, I’m here to say what older people tell you: don’t skip a step. 

Enjoy yourself when the time comes, be careful and attend social gatherings because you want to. 

Doing things for the right reasons and with knowledge is the right way to do it.